Facing Up To WWDB’s Matt Tsuruda’s Counsel: ‘Look At Yourself In the Mirror’

Matt and Sandee

Sandee and Matt Tsuruda

“Look at yourself in the mirror. Understand how people are looking at you.”

-Matt Tsuruda, Amway Diamond and World Wide DreamBuilders leader

When he made that remark, Matt Tsuruda was at a WWDB Dream Night and talking in terms of people’s credibility in business—how they carry themselves, what they wear, and a variety of other first-impression types of traits.

As I think of people, whether close friends and family or those I know only at a distance, there is a mental image that pops up. Most notably, it’s an image of their face and their overarching expression—the look that most frequently comes over them. In some cases, it’s intense, and in others it’s sort of cranky.

Then there are those whose faces are beaming from ear to ear, a certain lightness flowing from a smile that conveys genuine joy. That’s a description that suits Matt Tsuruda, someone with whom I have had only limited interaction over the years at WWDB conferences.

Along with his wife, Sandee, Matt consistently exudes that joyful light and life that brightens a room. Without even uttering a word, he speaks volumes about how he feels about himself and others. In that respect, he’s no different than anyone else, really. We all have the ability to attract or repel others based on our demeanor.

I was at the gym today and crossed paths with a woman I’d never seen before. Each of the three times that we passed each other, I made eye contact with her and smiled. Not a fake smile, but a warm, genuine one. It’s just something I guess I do—kinda like greeting people with a friendly “hello.”

Each time, there was no noticeable change in her facial expression. She had what appeared to be a permanent scowl on her face. But honestly, I don’t think that she was scowling on the inside. It’s like a friend of mine who looks angry when she’s not angry at all. I once asked her, “What’s wrong?” She looked at me, puzzled, then replied, “Nothing.”

Upon further discussion, it came out that when she’s thinking deeply about something, her facial expression gives the impression that she’s really mad.

As I get older, I’m starting to get “Grandma’s mouth.” My mom’s mom’s mouth, for whatever reason, had a tendency to frown. It had nothing to do with what was going on with her inside. It’s just that the corners of her mouth would start to turn downward. It gradually happened with growing frequency, until we termed the look as “Grandma’s mouth.”

I don’t want to look like that. That’s not a true reflection of who I am. I want my outer being to reflect my inner state. So while I don’t think we should be crazily obsessive about studying what we look like, I do think it helps to follow Matt Tsuruda’s advice.

Every once in a while, then:

“Look at yourself in the mirror. Understand how people are looking at you.”

Related Posts:

From A (Amway) to Z (Zappo’s), the Power of a Positive First Impression
Amway, WWDB Leader Laurie Duncan: ‘Headline’ Your Conversations

 

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